Saturday, December 28, 2013

A Summary of the Hobbit/ Fellowship of the Ring by Sean Kienle

I meant to write an entry about our New Zealand trip, and then this happened.  Last night I was having trouble falling asleep (probably because we'd slept 15 hours after our return from New Zealand), and so I asked Sean to tell me a story.  What follows is Sean's late night re-telling of the Hobbit/ Fellowship of the Ring.


Sean: There is this short guy.  He lives in an underground house and is kind of a grouch.  He is perfectly content to live by himself and do nothing.  Then, this tall guy comes and he’s like, “Want to go on an adventure?” and the short guy’s like, “No.”  And then, the tall guy is like, “Are you sure?”, and he’s like “Yes, I’m sure.”  The tall guy is like “Okay!” and when the short guy shuts his door, the tall guy writes something on it.  Later, a medium guy shows up and says, “Hey, I’m here for the adventure”.  Then, more medium guys show up who are ready for the adventure. Then, they eat all of his food and sing a bunch of songs.  The tall guy, oh yeah, he’s there too, is like “Hey, we’re going on an adventure, and you’re coming too!”  And so they go on an adventure.  Later, the short guy, whose name is Bilbo, is back in his underground house, and there’s another short guy there named Frodo.  Bilbo’s like “I’m really old and dying, and you should have this ring.”  I guess the ring is from the first adventure, but I forgot to mention it.  And then, three other short guys join Frodo, not Bilbo, and they’re like “We need to take this ring somewhere.”  I don’t remember where.  Or, why they’re doing this at all. But, they do.  Then, they’re climbing a mountain, and Frodo’s like “Hey, I’m going to put this on”, and he disappears.  Then, grim reapers appear!  [Sarah: Wait, you forgot the part at the inn!  He doesn’t put on for the first time on the mountain. Sean: This is my story.  When do the grim reapers appear?  Sarah: I’m going to make a note.] Then, they run away, and apparently the grim reapers are really slow because they don’t catch them.  Instead of finding Gandalf, who was supposed to be there or something, they say, “Let’s go to the bar.” And the barkeeper is like, “We don’t serve your kind here.”  [Sarah: I think you’re just making things up now.”]  And then Frodo is like, “I’m going to fall off this barstool and become invisible.”  Then Vigo Mortensen is like “Hey short guys, come sleep in my room.”  And they’re all like ‘Definitely!” And they do.  Then the grim reapers show up and are going to stab them in the bed. And they do. But then it turns out they aren’t in the beds; they are on little horses…or something.  I don’t remember what happens.  Then they go to the river place, and all of these different people are arguing about something. The ring!  They are arguing about the ring, but I don’t remember what they are saying. A medium sized guy tries to hit the ring, and it doesn’t work like you think it should.  They have to put a ring in a volcano for some reason.  The short guys say, “We’re short!  So, we should do it!” Everyone else is like “We’ll go too!  It’ll be fun.”  And that’s how they sorted the Ringling Brothers (because of the ring).  But, not everybody went.  Some people were like, “We’re going to stay here because we can see the future.”  And then, because there are no cars, airplanes, or horses of different sizes, they decide to walk forever, like across the country.  And the tall guy, the wizard who is back for some reason, is like “Let’s walk up this snowy mountain.”  Everyone is like “Okay!”  Then, when they are half way up the mountain and its snowy, they say, “This sucks!  Let’s go somewhere else.”  The tall guy says, “It’s this or we can go into a dwarf tomb!”  And everyone says, “Tomb! Tomb!”  So, they go to the tomb and then it’s gross and creepy like you’d expect a tomb to be, and it’s like a maze, which sounds fun but isn’t.  They walk across a really unsafe bridge single file with no guardrails over a deep chasm. At the same time, they have to fight a whip monster that is on fire and has a whip.  The tall wizard decides to break the bridge, and he does.  But the monster gets him, and they fall until they land on top of a tall tower, which doesn’t make sense.  But wait!  You aren’t supposed to know that yet.  He dies.  Then they are sad for a few minutes.  And, come out of the tomb (which apparently is just a tunnel), and come to a giant lake.  One guy says, “You know who should be in charge of this ring?  Boramir.” [Sarah: Nobody says this!]  And Boramir agrees.  Then, I don’t know what happens.  Boramir gets killed, and the short guys sneak away.  Did I mention the short guys are called hobbits?  And that’s the story of the brotherhood of the ring.  The end.

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Mac Store Fun

Today we went to the Mac store to replace my computer charger.  While we were there, waiting for it to be replaced, I played with the iPad on the table next to me.  I noticed that the computer-owned iPad had two unread text messages.  Naturally, I looked at them.

The text messages read:

Random person: Hey!
Random person: Which beach do you want me to pick you up at?

So, again naturally (with some encouragement from Sean), I responded.

Me: Pacific Beach

And, to Sean and my surprise, random person responded.

Random person: Right now?
Random person: ??????
Me: Yes.
Random person: Okay.
Me: Can't wait to see you!

And, then we left the store.  We've been giggling about it ever since.

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

George R.R. Martin is EVIL.

At the beginning of June, I (finally) started reading Game of Thrones (specifically Book 1) by George R. R. Martin.  Sean has already read the first three books.  I knew that something big happened at the end of Book 3 since a lot of people had posted about it on Facebook after that particular episode aired, and I figured that someone major had died. 

A couple of weeks ago the following conversation occurred.

me: Who dies at the end of book 3?
Sean: I'm not telling you that!  Why would I tell you that?
me: Is it Character X [i.e., one of my favorite characters]?
Sean: Noooooo.....

[To be fair, he did not do a long drawn out "Noooo", which everyone knows means "yes".  But, since I know him so well, I knew to look at his dimple, and since his dimple showed when he said "No", it meant he was lying.]

me: IT IS CHARACTER X! WHY DID YOU TELL ME?  
Sean: It's not him.  
me: It is.  I saw your dimple.
Sean: Ask me about someone else.
me: Is it Character Y?
Sean: No.  [See, the dimple thing didn't happen this time.  Then, I REALLY knew that Character X had died.]
me: It's Character X.  Your dimple told me.
Sean: Why did you ask?  
me: I can't believe you told me.  Stupid books. I didn't want to know.
Sean: You asked!
me: This is your fault.

Skip forward in time to last night.  Sean had gone to sleep, and I was reading Book 1.  All of a sudden, Character X appears to die, but I didn't think anything of it since I knew he/she survived until Book 3.  However, I wanted to confirm his/her aliveness with Sean. 

me: Sean, did Character X really die?

[Sean is asleep at this point.]

Sean: What?  
me: Is Character X dead?
Sean: Well, what just happened.
me: [Insert me telling him.]
Sean: Yes, Character X died.
me (now tears are welling up in my eyes): BUT YOU SAID HE DIDN'T DIE UNTIL BOOK 3!  
Sean: No, I thought I told you Character X died in this book.
me: NO!  I was prepared for Character X's death in Book 3.  Not NOW!  I thought it was not a real death!  I figured they had a really good look alike.  

[Tears were shed.  Sean had to comfort me.  He also laughed at me.]

Me: WHO WRITES A BOOK WHERE GOOD DOES NOT TRIUMPH OVER EVIL!?!?!?!?  George R.R. Martin is evil.

[More tears were shed.  Sean still had to comfort me. He also was still laughing at me.]

Me: I know that I am crying over a fictional character.
Sean: It's not the first time.  And, it won't be the last.

Friday, January 11, 2013

Christmas Shenanigans

Oh yeah, we have a blog!  Who knew?

Sean and I did our usual hectic traveling over Christmas break.  For me, it wouldn't feel like Christmas without all the traveling since every Christmas since birth, my family has driven the 21 hours up to Illinois (and most years, Michigan) to visit our grandparents and extended family.  Sean, on the other hand, grew up staying in one place, but he is a good sport about all of the traveling (for the most part).

We left on December 17 in the evening.  I remember it was the afternoon because I took the GRE test in the morning, so it really felt like Christmas break when we got on that plane.  This particular test scheduling could have been good (i.e. I did really well) or bad (i.e. I did not do really well); luckily, it turned out well for all involved!  Our first stop of our Christmas traveling was Louisville, Colorado to see our Kienle family.  They promptly got snow, which I appreciate since I only have to deal with it for two weeks every year. 

SNOW!
One of my absolute favorite things about the Kienle house is that I have a pair of slippers that stay there year round (so does Sean), and when we come visit, Lisa (my mother in law) puts them out by the bed.  We also eat VERY well.  Much better than we were eating at home for the previous week since Sean and I had purposely not gone grocery shopping.  A lot of "what can we make out of what is left in the fridge?" meals were had that particular week.

One morning I woke up and said, "Sean, did you hear something breaking?"  Sean said, "No."  So, I went back to sleep (which is quite typical), and Sean got up (which is also quite typical).  As soon as he stepped out the door, he came back in and said, "Sarah, you need to come see this."  


The giant, hand-axed down Christmas tree had plummeted downward spraying needles EVERYWHERE.  Sean and I therefore answered the age old question: If a tree falls down in the living room, does it make a sound?

Just in case you thought I was lying!

The answer is YES, and it makes a gigantic mess!  In other news, Lisa won this year's Kienle Family Competition.  In order for me to win, I need there to be a lot less bowling and a lot more flexibility-based competitions.

Because we are not yet at the financial point where we can choose flights based on convenience rather than price, the entire Kienle family was up at 4am to take us to our super early flight to Austin, Texas the day after Christmas.  Daniel must love Sean a whole bunch, because I don't think I would get up that early to get on a flight to see my sisters' off....I say that, but I think I did do that for Madison at one point.  But I promptly swore "NEVER AGAIN!" afterwards.

After a fun airport game of what-gate-do-you-actually-want-us-at-and-how-much-longer-are-you-going-to-delay-our-flight, we made it to Texas.  I almost didn't recognize our ride, because the minivan was not (yet) decked out in its holiday attire of Christmas lights and reindeer antlers + nose.  

We celebrated our Stachura Christmas that night, and, most importantly, I got to see my adorable nephew who I hadn't seen in 7 months.  Sean hadn't seen him since the week of his birth, so I guess he wins that particular contest.


Two days later, we did our annual road trip up to Farmer City, Illinois.  I've perfected the art of sleeping in the car, so between sleeping, knitting, reading, and some TV show watching, we made it up to Illinois.  Of course we stopped at Lambert's, Home of the Throwed (yes, I spelled that correctly) Rolls.  A road trip up (and back) would not be complete without it.  

On New Year's Eve we snuck alcohol in to my grandparent's farm house (I'm not too worried they find out, since neither of them are on the Internet.  Don't you dare tell them!).  This was a family effort, and my aunt, uncle, parents, sisters, cousins, and Sean and I were careful to hide all of the evidence!  Because I was sick with a bad cold, as soon as it hit midnight I was in bed.  It was a struggle to stay up that late.  I blame it on being ill, NOT on being old.  

Mom and Dad drove Sean and me to Chicago to catch our respective flights.  Sean flew from Midway back to San Diego, and I flew from O'Hare to San Francisco for a conference.  But that's a whole other story....

The moral of this particular adventure was that my suitcase weighed 49 pounds on the way to Colorado and only 47 on the way back to San Diego.  Therefore, I did not get nearly enough presents this Christmas.   What a bust!